Once in a Blue Moon

Two Minds

I have been of two minds lately

In this blue moon month

And even unaware

I have felt it's influence

I have been of two minds lately

One to laugh and one to cry

I have done some good things lately

Like singing in the rain

And carefully picking wild flowers

To make a bouquet

Or wading in the water

And writing down the pain

I have been of two minds lately

One to laugh and one to cry

I've listened to the Angels

Singing in the wind

I've seen the birds flying

Riding the thermals in the air

And felt their joy and despair

I've watched the river flowing

And the tides come in & out

And I've even gone to work

When I didn't want to

Discovering I still knew the way

Feeling better for it

None of this has been in vain

I have been of two minds lately

One to laugh and one to cry

I have been unpacking lately

Finding evidence of life & love

I have been crying and weeping

And crying some more

From a well I thought was dry

I have been of two minds lately

One to laugh and one to cry

I didn't know I could shed so many tears

I thought I'd cried all there was 

I thought my grief was over

I thought I'd closed that door

Only to find it open

The floodgates extended

The damn broken

while I sat upon the floor

Among the buried treasure

Of photographs and more

My brother's army hat

A letter from my sister

My mother's silly poem

About the cat that kissed her

My father's diary and their union pins
My firstborns baby bracelet

Tiny bits and pieces

I thought that I could keep

To hold their memories in

Scattered mementos carefully packed

Hoarded against the day

When my memory

began to fade

Life contains so much that

Death can take away

I have been of two minds lately

One to laugh and one to cry

I've wondered about my mind lately

Because I never know quite where or when

The crying would begin

Or when that lonesome feeling

Would find it's way in

I have been of two minds lately

One to laugh and one to cry

Then a friend told me

There is no right way to grieve
Grieving knows its way
And when we discover we feel alone  
We are because  

We have lost the ones we love

In crying I acknowledge that

In laughing I do too

And find that the loves I thought I lost
Are just a thought away

And are brought nearer to me
Whispering in my ear
I love and support you

And I feel them all around me

Once in a new, blue, or full moon

I have been of two minds lately

One to laugh and one to cry


written June 7, 2007  revised 9/9/11
By Pattra Burnetto Monroe